UNITED STATES - In an effort to be ready for the 2026 World Cup,. racists across the United States announced their plan to unite behind the United States Men’s National Team (USMNT) in an effort to promote American exceptionalism until the team loses at which point they will all blame a non-white player for the loss.
“USA USA USA USA USA,” stated one of the press releases from a group of racists in a compound somewhere outside of Moscow, Idaho. “USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USAUSA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USAUSA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USAUSA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USAUSA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USAUSA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USAUSA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USAUSA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USAUSA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USAUSA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USAUSA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USAUSA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USAUSA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USAUSA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USAUSA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA USA.”
For their part, the American Outlaws (one of the USMNT supporters groups that exists to make money) stated, “We can’t control who roots for the USA or not but we should all pull together no matter what to encourage everyone to root for the boys and financially support AO Chapters near you in a moment of togetherness so we can make more money so we can send a crack team of professional supporters to games for free.”
The Nutmeg News will cover this as it happens