Bruce Arena To Dan Gargan, "Draw Me Like One Of Your Strikers"

Los Angeles - Bruce Arena has reportedly asked Dan Gargan to paint a nude representation of the head coach after he approved of the Gordon painting that is now hanging in the hallways of The Getty.

No thank you, fifteen is my limit on Schnitzengruben!

No thank you, fifteen is my limit on Schnitzengruben!

Arena was supposedly entranced by the interplay of light and shadow while simultaneously approving of the blurring of Gordon's genitals. 

"A man's package is his own, but the world should see his body, and everyone needs the Bruce." said Arena to a shocked Gargan.

Let the muse take you all the way down to funky town. Wink Wink... Nudge Nudge... Say No More

Let the muse take you all the way down to funky town. Wink Wink... Nudge Nudge... Say No More

Gargan said that he hopes to start a new trend of soccer nudes by painting Arena and then Sigi Schmid who has volunteered to take it all off, for art.

"Sigi said that if Bruce's nude body is able to be translated into the ethereal sphere of beauty and fragility while suggesting strength, that he (as well) will pose nude... fully nude" said Gargan to shocked onlookers.

The Nutmeg Nude will have more on this, but we really hope that we will not.