Dallas, TX - Travis Tarkington, a casual soccer fan, took his brilliant and original idea to re-brand the New York Red Bulls to be the New Jersey Red Bulls to the internet on Wednesday as he peppered the various websites and social media constructs that he visits with his wholly original plan to save the team and spur attendance.
"They play IN New Jersey, so they should be FROM New Jersey," ranted Tarkington online to a collection of passionate Red Bull fans who have heard every single stupid re-branding idea foisted upon them by individual know-it-alls since the team was purchased and re-branded from the Metrostars over 10 years ago.
"See, they play in New Jersey, so they should be FROM New Jersey," stated the man who has never traveled outside the Dallas/Fort Worth area and whose experience with the area of New York comes from sneak watching episodes of Sex In The City for the occasional nudity.
While fans of the New York Red Bulls attempted to explain the problematic idea of New Jersey branding based on the season tickets of the team combined with the idea of land value, where you can build a stadium on an island, the New York Giants, and transportation in the area, Tarkington forged ahead stating, "Think of all the players from New Jersey! They could be from New Jersey and represent New Jersey!"
The Nutmeg News will have more on this as Tarkington explains that he refuses to drive 90 minutes, in traffic, to watch FC Dallas games because the stadium is in Frisco.