"I Only Smashed Two Controllers Last Week," States Professional FIFA Player

Richmond, VA - Professional FIFA player YANCEY1337 praised his self control as he stated, “I only smashed two controllers this week,” to his Twitter account on Monday.


Damon Foley, otherwise known as YANCEY1337, stated that despite the recent patches by EA Sports and the completely random glitches that cause even professional players to lose from seemingly unassailable positions that he felt like he had turned a corner on his anger.

“I’m doing better,” stated Foley to The Nutmeg News, “and I’m working on a regimen that allows me to place the games in context as I head to e-MLS cup in a little bit.”

With many players reporting completely jarring gameplay that results in losses to poor players who get bailed out by referees or game glitches such as an inability to switch to correct players, many of them were interested in the fact that professionals are also feeling the pain.

“I’ve had a lot of people asking me what my new regimen is for enjoying FIFA 19 and it’s very simple,” stated Foley. “I’ve just stopped playing the game as much and I’m working on a new Australian Football League series on my Twitch channel. People are really interested.”

The Nutmeg News will have more on this as Foley prepares for E-MLS Cup by practicing primal scream therapy and smashing cardboard mockups of his controllers.