Boston, MA - The Boston Breakers, in association with Paxil and the teams current form, have announced a new "Grief Counseling and Therapy Night" promotion aimed at solving the issues that have developed in their remaining fanbase from an 11 loss season having played 13 games.
"The Boston Breakers understand that a season like this can develop long lasting mental scars that can be debilitating for future support in sports," stated Tom Durkin, Club Director of Coaching. "As such we are offering free antidepressants and grief counseling for our remaining fans that sadistically torture themselves by continuing to show up for games despite our awful form."
Reportedly, the Breakers plan to fix the problem of their season is to not improve their overall team, but instead treat the mental issues for their fanbase that comes from having a terrible season stating, "We aren't paying for shit! We are going to stick with this squad until the end of the year and then we might try some new players," stated Durkin.
The Nutmeg News will have more on this as fans continue to wonder if the team could go with no more wins for the rest of the season, and whether their prescription will last long enough to continue attending games.