MLS Charges Real Salt Lake Players With Entering Zlatan Ibrahimovic's Personal Locker Room

Sandy, UT - Major League Soccer (MLS) announced on Monday that they would be opening a disciplinary case against the Real Salt Lake team for entering Zlatan Ibrahimovic’s personal locker room in Rio Tinto Stadium after Real Salt Lake lost to the LA Galaxy 2-1.

(AP Photo/Jae C. Hong)

(AP Photo/Jae C. Hong)

“We simply cannot have an opposition team entering the locker room of one of our stars,” stated MLS Director of Zlatan Affairs Paul Phillipe. “The home locker room in Rio Tinto Stadium was dedicated to Zlatan as a personal changing room, and he was SHOCKED to find the entirety of the Real Salt Lake team within.”

Sources say that Zlatan was accosted by the sight of RSL players in various stages of undress as he entered his personal locker room after the game.

“His delicate sensibilities were offended,” stated one anonymous insider.

For their part, the league indicated that they would be fining the RSL staff and players for interfering with Zlatan and that they would have to perform a mandated 30 hours of community service.

“We must protect our assets and our Zlatans,” stated Mr. Phillipe. “We must ensure that this tragedy does not happen again. Real Salt Lake players were provided with a broom closet and a mop bucket for changing facilities. If they want to have something better than that, then they should figure out how to be Zlatan.”

The Nutmeg News will have more as Zlatan requests a separate field to play upon than the rest of the teams.