The Nutmeg News allows interns to write stories as a way to give them an opportunity for success as well as give us a break to play FIFA. This article was written by fifteen year old Becky Goodhaven and has not been edited in any way. -The Nutmeg News
Did you hear what Montreal Impact's Joey Saputo told Nick De Santis to do to their coach Frank Klopas? Yeah they fired him, duh! We all knew that. But get this, did you hear HOW they did it? No? Ohmygod You are not going to believe this.
Ok, so I heard from Emily who heard from Tracie who talked to Amanda who says her dad read a sports blog that says De Santis fired him OVER THE PHONE.
I know I know I know right? Drama!!
They've been together two years and he couldn't even meet him like after practice by his locker or something. I mean when Chris and I were dating (Chris is the really cute guy on the basketball team who is really into old rock bands like Nirvana) anyway, when we were dating he got mad because I wouldn't ever give him a bj because I wanted to take things slow and because, ew, right? Ok, anyway, when HE decided that he didn't want to be with me anymore he met me outside my class after third period and was like "Um, I don't want to date anymore." And then I told him he's just a giant perv and that he has a lot to learn and that his music sucks and that his hair is stupid. But at least he was man enough to come talk to me in person. By the way, Chris, I would totally take you back if you want, you're music isn't stupid and you're totally hawt please don't date Stacy she's a skank and has given like a thousand handjobs and you'll probably catch the clap.
Anyway. So De Santis is totally like Chris, right? Klopas isn't putting out for him or something but he's like totally scared to talk to him face to face because he'll probably see his abs and be like OHMUHGAWD and just like totally not fire him because of his hot bod. It would have been better if De Santis at least got one of his friends to go to Klopas and talk to his face and break up for him, but even that is a pretty shitty thing to do and I'd still be pissed.
I even heard that De Santis and Saputo totally unfriended Klopas on his Facebook, Instagram, AND Twitter the night before they fired him. I mean, whoah, right? How did he not see this coming. I guess Klopas either didn't get the hint or else his phone was dead and he didn't check in or something, but still Saputo was totally trying to avoid talking to him. LAME.
So to summarize, my yearbook class says that each story has to have the five w's: who, what, when where, and why.
Who: Saputo and De Santis and Klopas
What: Klopas was fired
When: A couple days ago or something?
Where: OVER THE PHONE
Why: Because Joey Saputo is totally in love with Klopas and was like there's no way he can talk to him in person because it'd be way to hard to break up with him if I had to look at him and his awesome hair and plus he's probably wearing that shirt that he really likes but he won't let him borrow it and his dad has a really awesome car that they were going to use to go to prom this year and all his friends are super jealous of him and Chris please take me back, you can post a comment to this story and I'll totally call you. Please don't date Stacy, I hate her.