Man Guarantees Five Minutes Of Pure Fury For His Rec League Team

Boulder, CO - William Smith, a former high school soccer stand out for Aurora Central, has guaranteed his co-ed rec league soccer team five minutes of pure fury when he plays for them in a substitute roll this season.

While Smith has put on weight recently due to his sedentary job and lack of regular exercise, he has also managed to keep enough of his former quickness to make a complete pest of himself at max speed for about five minutes during the times when he is substituted onto the field.

"I plan on getting out there about 30 minutes into the game, running like absolute mad, getting myself into a good position with the ball at my feet, taking a shot, shanking a ball out for a goal kick, and then running around for 3 more minutes before calling for a substitute and going over to sit in the shade" said Smith. "I still know how to play the game, and I still can move really fast for a guy that is 40lbs overweight. So I plan on making sure that my time on the field is a furious and flabby tornado of maniacal intensity."

Smith's teammates say they appreciate his approach to the game, but wonder what he would be like if he paid more attention to his fitness in between the seasons. 

"He could probably be really great if he just ran a bit more", said Susan Ochs - Midfielder.

"I mean, he is surprisingly fast, but he just runs out of gas. We typically get two or three really good bursts from him before he goes to sit on the sideline", said Garrett Robinson - Defender.

Smith said that he plans on looking into some offseason training next year but he is going to have to balance that against attending the Great American Beer Festival.