The Nutmeg News Takes Credit For Sporting Kansas City Turnaround

Since being chastised in a Nutmeg News article from March 16th (, Sporting Kansas City have turned around their results in Major League Soccer (MLS). After the loss on the 12th of March and The Nutmeg News (TNN) column on the 16th of March, Sporting KC have taken 7 of 9 points and pulled themselves up the table to 4th in the Western conference of Major League Soccer.

TNN talked to Peter Vermes about the improvement after the win against the Philadelphia Union, "Absolutely, TNN was the reason why this season has turned around. The players read the article to each other and vowed that they would improve. This article is the sole reason for our good form in the last three games. Ike Opara just wouldn't put it down, he kept on clipping sentences from it and sending it to me on Facebook. I thought about unfriending him but he is the only person who keeps on helping me out in Candy Crush."

The Nutmeg News interviewed the editorial staff of The Nutmeg News and we were able to confirm that we are very proud of our continued efforts at enforcing accountability within the ranks of Major League Soccer. "It's clearly obvious how much of an impact this article had on the team. You could see the impact immediately. We awarded ourselves an additional bonus because of ourselves and stocked the beer fridge with an entire rack of Dom Pérignon's Carlo Rossi Blush to celebrate. We are pretty great and you can ask around the office how amazing we are", we said.

TNN asked Robert Blidart, a man on the street, for his opinion on The Nutmeg News article and he had the following to say, "who?"

TNN also spoke with Elizabeth Darrow for her opinion and she stated the following, "Yes, TNN is great, and honestly the sole reason why a team would win in sportsball. Hail to xenu the magnificent for all your gifts."

The Nutmeg News will have more on The Nutmeg News and the successes of The Nutmeg News as it happens.