LOS ANGELES - Los Angeles Football Club (LAFC) players were reportedly distraught after being unable to salute their travelling fans at the end of the El Tráfico rivalry game as the away fans traveled in camouflage.
“We were very disappointed in the result, but I always want to tell our fans that we appreciate them,” stated one anonymous player. “I looked everywhere in the stadium and couldn’t find them. I know that this result didn’t go their way, but I didn’t think our fans would just abandon us like that.”
Managers and staff were equally mystified saying that they looked exactly where they thought that the fans would be, but didn’t see anything.
“This is really unbelievable,” stated one assistant coach. “I just didn’t think that our fans would abandon us. I looked up at the area where they supposed to be and all I saw was the typical Woodland markings as one would expect in Los Angeles at this time of year. I expect to see all of our travelling support, not a bunch of tree, shrub and shadow blob markings indicative of a high contrast disruptive pattern with irregular markings in sand, brown, green and black. I’m just shattered to be honest.”
Fans state that they were actually there the whole time as their attempt at Camouflage succeeded perfectly showing that, in fact, they were ready for battle by disappearing completely from battle as successful camouflage does.
“We won in the stands by being united and visibly invisible,” stated one anonymous LAFC fan. “It’s important for us to show our team that we are united by wearing clothes designed to disguise an individual or group. It’s WAR…. on the beer stands and VICTORY over cotton candy.”
The Nutmeg News will have more on this as we attempt to interview an LAFC fan regarding this but end up speaking to a speckled pattern of light in the Los Angeles woodland.