Woman Who Can't Plan Dinner Absolutely Ready To Attend World Cup In 8 Years

NEW YORK - Whilst having a difficult time making a decision about whether she can afford to patronize Pão De Queijo or Alnour or Papa's Kitchen or Christina's for dinner, soccer fan Andrea Guzman was reportedly absolutely ready and excited to attend the World Cup in the United States in 8 years.

The only thing you need to understand is FIFA and Coca-Cola!

The only thing you need to understand is FIFA and Coca-Cola!

"I can't wait," tweeted Ms. Guzman who currently doesn't have a job that would allow her to buy a $25 bus ticket to Rockaway Beach. "The games are going to be amazing and so much fun to attend."

Sources say that Guzman is still trying to nail down a career that will let her reach her aspirations as she struggles to make it in New York City on a daily basis.

"Andrea had to borrow money from me to wash her laundry last month," stated good friend Sandra Sahib. "I'm sure she will have it figured out in 8 years, though."

Experts indicate that 8 years is a long time, however they say that it isn't impossible to predict that tickets will be insanely expensive provided there isn't a major world war by that time.

"We expect tickets to be so expensive that we can't even begin to understand their value," stated director of metrics for New York University Carla Abreu. "There may be a cottage industry of indentured servitude or prostitution that will allow for early ticket purchase. Perhaps there will be a way of selling an entire human. We aren't certain. However, what we are certain is that it will be so expensive that if you can't already afford them right now, you won't be able to dream about them 7 years from now either."

The Nutmeg News will have more on this in 7 years from the front line of the Eastern Appalachian front where the Democratic Socialist Republic is pushing back on the Grafton Notch front line of the Holy Christian Empire of Patriot Americans.