Arlington, VA - An official with the Arlington Women's Soccer League (AWSL) stated that now was not the time to talk about Gun Control FC as they pushed off a decision on whether to allow or deny the team to play in the AWSL for the 20th consecutive year.
"Now is not the time to talk about Gun Control FC," stated Linda Browning, president of Arlington Women's Soccer. "With the season already started and recent games having happened, we must have respect for the process and delay talk about admitting them as a team into our league."
Players with Gun Control FC stated that they only want to play and that the vast majority of players within the AWSL agreed that they should be in place. However, league officials with the AWSL stated that this was not acceptable.
"If we let in Gun Control FC, we will have to let in All Pets Should Burn In A Fire FC, Anarchy For Everyone United, A.C. People Who Peer At You Over Bathroom Stalls To Check Out Your Genitals And Laugh At Them, and Single Payer Healthcare Revolution" stated Browning.
"We can't have league composed of anarchist, pet burning perverts who want to watch healthcare revolution play just because we want to let Gun Control FC into the league. Beside, the National Registration Alliance put a lot of money into our league to specifically keep us from registering Gun Control FC and we can't say no to money. We want to wish the best of luck to the Gun Control FC players as they work towards their goal of becoming professional players, even without a team on which to play. We are sending our thoughts and prayers to them."
The Nutmeg News will.... ah....you know what... we will have more on this but, let's be honest, ABSOLUTELY nothing is going to change.