Cleveland, OH - At the Republican National Convention in Cleveland, Lou Holtz took time out of his busy schedule to advocate for local soccer while dropping a number of ethnic slurs against immigrants attempting to force him to watch Bayern Munich.
"I don't want to celebrate your holidays, I sure as hell don't want to cheer for your soccer team," stated Holtz to Betsy Woodruff, Daily Beast reporter.
The Nutmeg News tracked down Holtz to have him expand on his comments and he had the following to say, "Those fucking krauts and jerrys aren't going to get me to watch Bayern Munich. I remain a fan of my local Columbus Crew, who I started following back in 1968 when I was an assistant coach at Ohio State," said Holtz who reportedly was described as smelling like alcohol and desperation as he relentlessly swigged Crown Royal.
"Support local soccer, support promotion and relegation. The only way that we are getting our way out of this socialist MLS shit is if we find a way to bring in the most ruthless form of capitalism possible. We MUST enable our local clubs to fail. Immigrants support Socialism. I'm from the US OF A. My parents were true blooded Americans and their grandparents and their grandparents all the way back to when we were celebrating St Patricks day in 1230 AD in the city of New Amsterdam."
The Nutmeg News will have more on this as Holtz started ranting about MLS Television ratings being brought down by Liga MX.