US Men's National Team Fan Vows Revenge Against Columbia

NEW YORK - Every-Four-Years soccer fan Henry Hardinger has reportedly vowed revenge against "Columbia" after watching the United States Men's National Team lose against the nation of Colombia on Friday evening in the opening game of the Copa America.

Now you know why James is so good. His matriculation was on fleek.

Now you know why James is so good. His matriculation was on fleek.

"Columbia has to pay for this disgrace," stated Hardinger on his Facebook page. "We are the greatest nation in the world and by god, our boys playing soccer are the best players in the world because they come from here. It's all the Columbians fault, them and Klinsmann!"

Hardinger's outrage quickly ran down from his frontal cortex into his arms moving quickly past his elbows and into his fingers bypassing any sort of spell check that would save him from the quick derision of his obvious mistake.

"WE DIDNT HAVE ANY ANSWERS AND KLINSMANN OUT" ranted Hardinger as he tried to understand a comment left on his page by his friend, and requisite troll, Darren Brighton who stated, "Yeah, and we even let them have a campus here and everything."

Reportedly drunk off of 15 Budweisers and having consumed an entire plate of nachos and three hot dogs, Hardinger spent the rest of the late night ranting on his twitter account about a Columbia Campus being built in our back yard and how President Trump is gonna fix all this stuff by closing our borders to people who want to educate our soccer enemies.

The Nutmeg News will have more on this as a drunk Mr Hardinger pleads with alumni associations on Facebook to stop sending money to support "the Columbians, cause they are good enough at soccer to begin with."