CHICAGO - The Chicago Fire announced a "Buy 0 Get 10" ticket event on Tuesday in order to attract fans as Andrew Hauptman panhandled tickets to anyone willing to talk to him at the 294 overpass right next to the McDonald's off 76th Ct.
"FREEE TICKETS! FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE TICKETS" screamed Hauptman as a line of cars drove by and the drivers attempted to not make eye contact with the owner of the Chicago Fire.
The Nutmeg News spoke with Hauptman on his new street corner about this new ticket sales event and he had the following to say.
"We are reducing tickets to a low low price! All you need to do is be living or willing to bring a corpse with you and we will give you tickets to the game. How many do you want? I'll give you 5... no 6... no 10...no 20 tickets! 20 Tickets and all you have to do is show up to a game with as many living or dead people, or even mannequins, to fill the stands."
Hauptman stated that he was considering filling the stands with sentient robots if he couldn't give away his tickets stating, "Robots don't care if you insult them and show them terrible play and ensure that in a league where everyone makes the playoffs that you don't. At least the ones we would have in the stands wouldn't care."
The Nutmeg News will have more on this as the Chicago Fire try to come up with more ticket giveaway ideas.