Vancouver, BC - Whitecaps fan Stephanie Zhang stated, "I just don't even know, anymore," after the Vancouver Whitecaps lost against the Portland Timbers at home and then beat F.C. Dallas on the road.
Zhang reportedly could not determine exactly whether the team is absolutely terrible, moderately decent, or just an amalgam of both options.
"I'm pretty certain this is just the league doing what the league does, but the whiplash is really getting to be a bit much," stated Zhang to The Nutmeg News. "As terrible as the Timbers are, I would have expected to win that game, especially at home. Then as good as F.C. Dallas is at home and in the league, I absolutely expected to lose that game. I'm becoming slightly numb to the whole thing at this point."
Reportedly, the angst felt by Zhang after the loss against the Timbers has only been exacerbated by the Whitecaps winning on the road as the 3 points did nothing to fix the confusion felt by Zhang about whether her team is actually any good.
"Maybe the Whitecaps are a Schrodinger's team. They exist in all states until I look at the team either in person or on the television. I'm just very confused about how bad we are... or good we are... or terrible we are... because I'm pretty certain we are terribly bad at being good, and the only thing I can come up with is that we are a poor to mediocre team playing in a mediocre league where weird things happen and nothing makes any sense. So I'm just going to go with that until somehow the Caps catch fire and we end up winning MLS Cup in 2017"
The Nutmeg News will have more on this as that doesn't happen.