NWSL Changes Acquisition Rules To Actual Calvinball

The National Women's Soccer League (NWSL) announced that they recently revised their rules on allocation and acquisition at the 2016 draft. Reportedly the NWSL made a number of different changes in the way in which international and non-attached players could be allocated. In order to help fans understand these rule changes the NWSL released the following statement on their rule change.




The Nutmeg News can confirm that the league is now allowing the square root of X when Y attacks in a purple phase allowing the green garden goalie to supersede the format of Pluto while it phases behind the moon. Reportedly this will allow national team players to form a quorum huddle to dictate their acquisition rights via a mock trial held with croquet mallets, a Huxtable daughter (preferably Tempest Bledsoe), and a battle to the death with the manager of their choice in the NWSL. There will be a light snack at noon which will be followed by a rage painting race to see who can synchronize their chi through interpretive art while their teammates pelt them with wedges of cheese from Guernsey. 

The Nutmeg News will have more on this rule change as it flows and grows with the need of the league.