"Promotion/Relegation Would Prepare Arsenal For Champions League," State Experts

Soccering experts around the New Jersey and Denver areas agree that promotion and relegation implemented in the English leagues would better prepare Arsenal for the UEFA Champions League.

What a bunch of schlubs.

"Arsenal was just placed in the Champions League, just like Minnesota. I mean, they basically bought there way in. If England had promotion/relegation this would have prepared them for the rigors of the Champions League. Instead what you have are two back-to-back 5-1 games, just like Minnesota United in the so-called Major League Soccer (MLS)," stated Promotion And Relegation advocate Dick Whitting. "Everyone knows that Promotion and Relegation would have prepared the team through merciless capitalism to prepare for the rigors of a home and home against Bayern Munich."

Reportedly, Whitting's nonsensical rambling included statements as to the vagaries of implementing a multi-tiered national structure that would make the English team the victor of the Champions League.

"We need to implement true P&R in North America in order for our clubs to compete in the CONCACAF Champions League and the English need it to compete better in the Champions League. We can make this dream happen!"

The Nutmeg News will have more on this as Whitting finds more things about which to complain.