Dynamo Fan Finds Solace From Unending Political Diarrhea In Listless Road Draw

Houston, TX - Houston Dynamo fan Wade Gutierrez admitted that he took to the Houston Dynamo - Seattle Sounders game last night to find solace and escape from the unending political diarrhea that has infected his Facebook and Twitter feeds.

Dean Rutz The Associated Press

"I don't care if it was still Owen Coyle out there and we only had 5% possession AND even if we lost, It was still better than looking at my cousin and her friend argue about Donald Trump, online," stated Gutierrez to The Nutmeg News on Thursday morning. "At least the Dynamo were just out there trying to play. We could lose by 10 goals and it is still more entertaining than Facebook right now."

Reportedly, Gutierrez checked into his Facebook and Twitter feeds at the half of the game and realized that nothing good was happening there as he was sucked into a comment thread for a person he doesn't even follow as he slowly began to realize how awful some of the family he has in his life act to those around him.

"I don't mind politics in sport. I actually think that politics and sport are intertwined, but at least politics and sport give me a palatable dose of athletic endeavor. Posting online gives me nothing but the feeling that some of my family and friends have nothing better to do with their life but launch personal attacks at everyone that surrounds them and then hope that they doing so will enlighten everyone on their feed. I'll take David Horst and Demarcus Beasley over that shit any day of the week."

The Nutmeg News will have more on this as Gutierrez takes to Facebook this morning to endlessly post comments about Ozzie Alonso and pictures of Ricardo Clark and Will Bruin in revenge for the 8 stupid racist news pages his aunt "liked" that showed up in his feed.