Man's Sole Purpose In Life To Note Inaccuracies Within Soccer Stories In Comments Section

WASHINGTON - Joel Bradding announced on Facebook that his sole purpose in life was to note small inaccuracies within soccer stories in the comments section.

It's Graham Zusi, not Grahm Zusi!

It's Graham Zusi, not Grahm Zusi!

"When I see inaccuracies, especially in the international media, it is my absolute duty to be an unapologetic dick to the writer of the article by calling him misinformed, missing the point, uneducated or perhaps moronic. These reporters don't know what they are doing by missing out on the subtle nuances of the sport at the microscopic regional level."

Mr Bradding's most recent foray was on a Guardian piece about Major League Soccer, "I noticed that they used a "THE" descriptor for the league instead of just writing MLS. It was my duty to pillory the author in the comments section while lambasting the league, the fans, the other reporters and every person who isn't me for their lack of understanding."

While his friends report that they don't know who we were asking about and asked whether we were talking about the guy who works in the corner cubicle that never talks to anyone at work, Mr Bradding said, "I have a great social life. I critique life, I critique sports, I am constantly entertaining myself because I trust that I know what I am doing."

Mr Bradding said the most difficult thing is keeping a regimen every morning to ensure that he covers all possible avenues to make a comment. "I have an extensive bookmark list and a timed schedule that covers Twitter, Facebook, message boards and Reddit in order to make sure that I see all the articles out there that need my guidance. It is important to make sure that I comment on the smallest NPSL story on the Washington Post or the largest Champions League story on SI. I especially ensure that I start long rants on Facebook comments to generate discussion there. It is an especially favorite portion of comment among my many fans. I'm also starting to expand into commenting on soccer stories based in the political realm. Very soon you will see my comments there, as well as my expanded presence on yelp."