Major League Soccer To Rename All-Star Game to Frank Lampard Memorial All-Star Game

NEW YORK - In honor of the deceased career of the long time Chelsea midfielder, Don Garber has announced that Major League Soccer (MLS) will rename the All-Star Game to the Frank Lampard Memorial All-Star Game Brought To You By Right Guard, Advocare, and Amway.

He was only 37! His career had a few days left in it, at most he could have given a few solid months!

"We felt that it was only right to honor the legend of soccer fanatic Frank Lampard as his career was tragically cut short in a transfer move to our league," stated Garber to The Nutmeg News on Friday.

"We will also be adding a warm, empty, European body to the Frank Lampard Memorial All-Star Game roster in remembrance of our dearly departed Frank. This season that honor will go to Steven Gerrard, who currently inhabits the physical dimensions of a uniform for the Los Angeles Galaxy, I'll have you know."

Insider sources say that Lampard has taken to continually reminding people that he is not dead, but this doesn't deter the league which is pushing ahead in a way to market and brand their All-Star game as something with historical significance.

The Nutmeg News will have  more on this as Major League Soccer attempts to find a funeral parlor sponsorship that will allow them to expand their branding into living AND the dead.